Hand Tattoos for Men For Girls for Women Tumble Words Quotes for Men Design Designs Writing : Celebrity Hand Tattoos For Girls For Women Tumble Words Quotes For Men Design Designs Writing

Thursday 3 October 2013

Celebrity Hand Tattoos For Girls For Women Tumble Words Quotes For Men Design Designs Writing

Celebrity Hand Tattoos Biography

Source:- Google.com.pk

I know it’s not nice to be mean about other people’s tattoos. Having spent years working in a tattoo shop I learnt to be tolerant and accepting of the diversity of the tattoo art form and the myriad ways and reasons people choose to adorn their bodies.

But what the fuck is up with celebrity tattoos?

These people are paid millions to look perfect. They have stylists. They have money. They spend more on fashion than many people would spend on a house.

Why do they all get such bogan-looking jail tattoos?

Maybe they just don’t care. With today’s film technology it can all be brushed out or make-uped over so, whatever.

Pretty much every celebrity tattoo I have ever seen is completely mental, but the celebrity who tops my list is Angelina Jolie. Every time I see her latest tattoo my brain explodes. Maybe it’s her reaction against being ‘the worlds most beautiful woman’. She just goes, ‘Hmm, next I’m going to visually represent my adoptive infant children by scratching lattitudes and longitudes into my bicep with a broken crack pipe’.

And what is up with ‘know your rights’? As if when you look at the back of Jolie’s neck in a really expensive couture gown you want some downer of a political statement staring back at you in patchy grey ink. How much of a turn-off is that?

Number two on my list is Christina Ricci, who I just noticed has a pair of praying hands poking out the top of her bikini that look suspiciously like someone drew a cock on her stomach. To be fair it is a blurry photo, but for most girls, if there was even the slightest possibility that their new tattoo looked like a cock drawn on their stomach they’d probably steer well clear.

Speaking of cocks, this leads me to number three – ‘My body is a wonderland’ aka John Mayer. In the words of a tattooer I know, ‘when people can’t draw a carp very well, it’s really easy for it to look like a cock.’ Unfortunately for Mayer, what he has on his upper arm is a classic cock-carp. The fact that he went and filled out his whole other arm with a sleeve of cock-carps and what look like cabbages is further testament to the fact that celebrities don’t have a clue when it comes to tattoos.

Where are they getting them from? Is there one real dodgy tattooist in Hollywood who just messes up everybody? I imagine he has a real pimping mansion and does house calls. Like that dodgy plastic surgeon Daniel Serrano who held ‘botox parties’ for A-list celebrities and is being accused of destroying their faces with injections of low-grade industrial silicone.

Number four is Nicole Ritchie. The only reason this anorexic bitch is in my top ten is the number of girls who came into the tattoo shop wanting to copy her stupid tiny back-wings. If there’s one tattoo that’s just totally stupid it’s back-wings. If anyone’s reading this getting pissed off because I’ve insulted their back-wings all I can say is - WHAT ARE THEY FOR? YOU CAN’T FLY!!

Celebrity Hand Tattoos For Girls For Women Tumble Words Quotes For Men Design Designs Writing